I am here again after a long time
My instinct brought me to you.
Give me a sign, when these demons will turn into angels?
I feel too tired and old now.
I wish for a day without pain:
When I will wake up with enthusiasm
and sleep satisfied.
I don’t want to be afraid of people’s questions,
their critical analysis on what is I am doing to my life.
I want to praise beautiful things
and be honest in whatever I write.
I want to be a courageous lover,
who loves passionately the woman he likes.
There are so many things I wish to do,
but I am stuck in this darkness
and unable to get out of it.
Why don’t you take care of me God?
Am I not your favorite child?
– 10th Sept 2015
Note- Lately, while going back home, the sound of Azaan moved me and I found myself inside the mosque reading namaaz. This is an edited version of dua part.
In the name of Allah
The gracious and the merciful.
The light of my eyes
that my eyes cannot see.
All my praise is for the mystery of the darkness:
Where there is no shadow, no sun.
The abyss-From where the echoes of God-
And spirituality return.
All my praise is for the space-time singularity-
For the day I will discover the truth, and make peace with it.
And for my death-
For it will reveal to me other dimension of reality.
All my praise is for love-
In love: I must lose myself.
As I will keep swaying like a wave-
Between the life I dream,
and the life
All my praise is
for all that is truly alive in me.
And all that wish to die in me.
All my praise is for the peace to my soul
The attainment of clarity
And the beauty of unity.
P.S. – I was reading about singularities and black holes. Generally, positive idea of light brings negative idea of darkness. I have tried to contemplate on both of them. There is an influence of the poem , “Unfound” by my friend Talah also.